You're reading the morning paper. Halfway through, you get to the weather and realize that you're reading a week-old copy that fell out of the bushes during last night's wind storm. But it doesn't matter! Why not? Because most of the stuff you're reading isn't news!

The paradigm, repeated ad nauseam every horrible day, is this: SHILLS for VICTIM GROUP blame PERSECUTORS for being insensitive to the HARM suffered by VICTIMS. Usually this is a prelude to some sort of spurious lawsuit, probably to be filed in Alabama, or in Alabama's alter ego, the 9th circuit federal courts. (Or if it's really, really stupid, in Florida.)